Still here

It was brought to my attention that I haven't updated in awhile. There has been tons to report but I haven't felt liking writing.

Connor has been changing a lot lately. He's still driving me crazy with his constant need to ask why and what. It's probably a good thing that he's cute otherwise he'd live permanently in his room. I really need to find a way of working out a way of him going to preschool. I love him to death but I need a break from him. I can't imagine what I could accomplish in a couple of hours twice a week. It would be wonderful.

I'm still working on finding me. Since having Connor I've become someone else. I can't remember what it was like not having Connor. I know I lived quite happily before he came into our lives but I can't remember anything I used to enjoy. Every time I try to find me I feel like I get pulled back in some how. It's almost like I'm not allowed to have the time to find myself.

Things had been going really great with Tom and I. We were working together so well. I was really proud and happy of how well we were getting along. This week though I've been snapping at him and he's been a little different too. I'm sure it's no fun coming home to a grumpy family every day, but this is my life. When he's home on the weekend he does better with just going with the flow of Connor in the evening. However, when he comes home from work it's like he has forgotten what Connor is like. I don't enjoy the crying anymore than anyone else does and sometimes you just have to do what he wants to make peace. It's just a sacrafice and I know I make many of those a day to keep my family happy.

On a side note guess who would never be able to handle two kids? Yeah, that would be me. Guess it's a good thing that it's impossible for us to have any more. I find that it's always fun to hear that when I'm already feeling down and crappy. Sorry, I'm still upset over that comment.